We Heal Together

Let's Talk about Apologies: Part 1.

Episode Summary

This is PART ONE of two-part episode series on apologies. In this episode, we are getting into an overview of apologies & examples of shitty apologies. Next week, I will cover how to improve the skill & become better at apologizing to others. Book recommendations are in the show notes. Be sure to check out the show notes for all citations + information. If you like my content, I would love to have you as a part of my community. I invite you to follow me on Instagram @codependentrecovery. Check out the show notes for information on how to purchase my workbook & how to join ZOOM community clubs. Don't forget that a new podcast drops every Monday. Tune in next Monday for a new episode. We heal better together. See y'all soon. Xoxo- Cordelia

Episode Notes

Podcast Info

• A new podcast episode drops every Monday.
• Music credit: L-Ray Music, Courtesy of Shutterstock, Inc.
• Learn more about your host, Cordelia, by clicking here
• Be sure to follow Cordelia on Instagram: @codependentrecovery
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WORKBOOK + COMMUNITY + RESOURCES

• Want access to free resources? Click here
• Need help finding a therapist? Click here
• Check out Cordelia's book recommendations here
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• Are you going through a breakup or divorce?  Here is the link to the 98-page workbook.  Print version + ebook version available worldwide.
• Want to join the community (i.e., community club or book club)? Click here
• Interested in any other affiliate links? Click here
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CITATIONS FOR TODAY'S EPISODE

Overview of an Apology

1. Definition of Apologize (Merriam-Webster)
2. Two key elements of an apology (Mind Tools)
3. You cannot force an apology (Psychcentral)
4. Harriet Lerner quote from Why Won't You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts by Harriet Lerner, PhD
5. Motives for apology
6. Four parts to an apology according to O’Hara

Types of shitty apologies

1. Tactical apologies
2. If apologies
3. NYT Examples
4. I’m sorry if
5. Jets Example
6. I’m sorry but
7. I’m sorry you
8. Déjà vu
9. You know I am..
10. I guess I..
11. Not my apology
12. Actions but no words
13. Let’s make a deal
14. Bringing up the other person’s crime sheet (Harriet Lerner) from Why Won't You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts by Harriet Lerner, PhD
15. Martyr/Victim Playing - from Why Won't You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts by Harriet Lerner, PhD
16. Demanding forgiveness
17. Love you though (or miss you)
18. Time passing
19. Generic “for everything”
20. Sarcasm: sorry!
21. Passive Voice
    • Famous examples

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BOOK RECOMMENDATIONS

• Why Won't You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts by Harriet Lerner, PhD